Have you ever stopped to listen? The conversation of the masses is almost entirely predictable. Where's the excitement? Where's the spark? It's as if the world has been invaded by robots. "Hope it don't rain." "Good game, huh?" "Would you like fries with that?"
Do you want to stand out from the crowd and have a greater influence on others? Do you want them to listen and respond to what you have to say? If so then consider a change in your communication habits. Words are powerful. They create romance, build business and topple kingdoms. Use them to your advantage. Here are four ways you can create greater influence in your life by using the right words.
Avoid the standard rhetoric: Don't answer the question, "How are you?" with anything your listener has ever heard. Instead, let them in on what's really happening. "Did you just get a new job, go on a blind date, get bit by a dog? Are you happy about it? Are you sad? Tell them. They asked didn't they? It's what they get. And use words they are not accustomed to hearing. The staff writers at OnlineCollege.org have assembled a buffet of unique verbiage in their article "50 Sophisticated Words You Should Start Using Instead." Pick a few and add them into your repertoire just for the fun of it. People perk up and listen when you tickle their ears with sounds they don't expect.
Be expressive:"The service was absolutely spectacular." "The meal was absolutely fantastic." The word "absolutely" increases the power of practically anything you suggest. "We will absolutely give you the best price ever." Who could argue with anyone that is this absolute? Whether you are asking for a date, selling a product or encouraging a wounded soul, the confident approach moves your influence into a higher level.
Ask for what you want: The price is less when you ask. The sale awaits the person who has the nerve to make the offer straight up. And why is your loser friend Tommy dating a girl that is out of his league? Because he asked. When we don't let our thoughts be known we often end up with what others want us to have instead of what we actually want. In his article "5 Reasons You Should Speak Up (Even When You Think You Shouldn't," best selling author Kevin Daum explains it well. Stick your neck out there. When your head gets lopped off, put it back on and go again.
Use a little humor:"I have the dumbest question of the day," I've often said to a receptionist when attempting to break through the keepers of the gate. It sure beats, "May I speak with Mr. Rejection?" Defensiveness melts like butter in the face of an amusing remark. They usually laugh and let me know the dumbest question of the day is one I couldn't dream of asking. It's like we're friends already. First cousins in a matter of seconds. Humor let's people know you are human which allows them to relax and tell you what you really need to know. The secret email address, the person you actually need to speak with, the combination of the safe. And all the passwords.
Do you want to be like everyone else, lost in the monotone humdrum that is every day conversation? Then say what everyone else is saying. But to be noticed, to influence others, to stir interest so that they respond to what you have to say, adjust your speaking habits. It will bring cheer to those around you and great benefits to your life.
My friend Glenn has a standard answer to anyone who asked, "How are you doing?" He looks them right in the eye and says, "I have had the diarrhea for three days." Different, but not recommended.
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